My grandmother sent me an email this morning that couldn’t have come at a better time. Lately I’ve been questioning myself and my actions but even further the people that surround my life.

“There comes a point in your life when you realize:

Who matters,
Who never did,
Who won’t anymore…
And who always will.
So, don’t worry about people from your past,
there’s a reason why they didn’t make it to your future.”

It’s hard to let people go sometimes. Especially when you care for them. How do you choose who stays and who goes? For me that’s been a constant battle. I try to avoid hurting people and in doing so just end up hurting myself. I have to learn to let go of the people or feelings that bring me down. In my new journey forward I will stand up for myself. I will choose.

Today is a new day. A new chance to start on the right path. Life can be hard at times. Temptations tend to get the best of me. I have to learn to see past temptation for a deeper understanding of quality, progression and change. I want to help change the world to be more educated and conscious about their decisions. We only have one life to live. I’d like mine to be something special.

I watched Food Inc. last night… talk about eye opening! It’s sad how much control the government has over the food we eat. I feel like a pathetic consumer caught up in the media. The lamest part is that I’ve known this problem existed but like everyone else I simply turned a blind eye. Well I’m tired of looking the other way. It’s time to stare this life right in the face. I will make change.

One 2 many cupcakes
Choking on my current state
A painted dream
Is so obscene
Always caught up in between
Finding time to run away
A sacred time for me to play
Deep within my hidden tent
I found myself I must repent
Awaken now u have it all
Awaken now I will not fall

Today is a very strange day… my feelings are filled with uncertainty. Unsure what to think what to feel what to be… Like what is this reality? My dog has hardly eaten nor have I. Beyond suffering from a cold I lie. I can’t deny I want to hide. Go outside and take a ride. It’s dark and cold were sick I’m told. Waiting anticipating as things unfold.

I have a fairy tale
I’m sure I’ve told a few
My moments are enchanted
I vant to be with you

A vampire in disguise
I’m flying through the trees
Glistening in the sun
State of disbelief

Caught in the moment
Transitioning to the moon
My love shall come along
Just don’t come to soon

Here’s a bunch of ideas I threw together in the spirit of the new year. I want to be more green! Green is for cool people.

- take stairs
- NO plastic bottles
- buy razor blades instead of full razors
- recycled toothbrush
- read labels
- eat local fresh organic
- wear a pin to remind yourself to be green
- eat less meat (meat takes more resources)
- start an eco food blog with photos
- wash clothes with cold water (saves tons of energy)
- buy special light bulbs
- unplug items when not in use
- only leave fridge door open when needed
- take short shower
- brush your teeth outside of the shower (saves water!)
- less toilet paper
- hang dry more clothes
- green energy
- online banking
- rechargable batteries
- green concert tickets

I feel amazing today!!! I feel like I’m listening to my heart. I know what I want and how I’m going to get it.

Ladies listen up! No matter how hard things get or how crazy your life is it’s never too late for change. You can do anything your heart desires if you try hard enough. If there’s something negative that’s bringing you down the solution is simple… you don’t need it and you don’t deserve it. Even if you do deserve it life is way too short for negativity.

I saw a quote today on a clients email signature. I think it sums it up pretty well.

LIFE IS SHORT, BREAK THE RULES, FORGIVE QUICKLY, LOVE FREELY, LAUGH UNCONTROLLABLY, AND NEVER REGRET ANYTHING THAT MADE YOU SMILE

I’m just chillin at the Lilypad. Me, Gavilan, Vega, Aww little Askum I can hear him breathing and dreaming . We ran two miles today! Around beautiful Lake Merritt. Even little Askum tagged along. OMG! I tried casual carpool today hehehe. I was a little skeptical at first but right when I walked up the bus took off so I decided to give it a shot! It wasn’t that bad The two people in the car didn’t say a single word so it was nice and peaceful . The talk radio on the other hand was disturbing! I can’t believe people start their day with so much negativity. Not cool!

Final Note — Animals can and will get along.

So I know you must be wondering what I’ve been up to… I went to Outside Lands this past weekend! I must say Tenacious D was FREAKIN AWESOME!!! My ultimate favorite show. And of course Incubus’ seductive ass! Man that boy knows he’s cute and will definitely take advantage haha. I missed Atmosphere UNFORTUNATELY! The one band I really really wanted to see. I guess it wasn’t meant to be.

Outside of Outside Lands I’ve been working and cleaning fun fun fun! I work for a new company now called Crushpad. I must say it’s been a great experience so far. Here is an article that talks about some of the people here and what we do… http://www.packagingdigest.com/article/CA6686076.html. Or you can go to www.crushpadwine.com. It’s a really neat place to be and I’m excited to learn how to make wine! Most of my time is spent working on the shopping carts for all the wine brands we support I think I’m going to learn to love wine by the time this is over. I had some mighty tasty bubbly yesterday when we kicked off harvest! Yay!

I know I’ve been super busy and somewhat neglectful.
I should learn to be more respectful
There’s just too many things on my mind.
I can barely find the time to be myself.
Focused on health… happiness and wealth.
Searching for freedom beneath the stealth.
Uncertain.
Still hurtin.
But knowing deep down I will succeed.
Damn this sucks… I’m always in need.
So what’s next?

Final Note — Love thy self!

So i have a new blog well it probably looks exactly like my old one but it’s actually new and improved. Now people can leave me comments! And if you have a gravatar it will show up automatically. I’m also excited to announce I have categories and archives oh my. I plan on posting a brand new comic strip series too! my first comic strip is near on its way… currently in sketch form.

I’m loving word press so far! It’s going to make adding a blog post super easy and convenient. I can’t believe I had a static blog… crazy times call for crazy measures . I’m also launching a new music website. I’ve already completed the website design. Now I just have to customize word press to match my design. The site is basically to allow me to share my music with my friends… but who knows where it will take me to.

Final Note — bloggity blog

So it’s been awhile since I’ve written… my deepest apologies . I guess I’ve just had sooo much going on I haven’t had the time. It’s one change after the next! I have a boyfriend now which is crazy (not my boyfriend! but the fact that i have one haha). Definitely different then being single for 3 years. Sorry boys I know I just broke your hearts hehe.

BIG NEWS!!! I’m moving to the city! Yup… that’s right. I’m moving to SOMA district this month! I’m beyond excited I’ll no longer be a Daly City girl… It’s official. I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time but haven’t really had the time or money! I can’t believe it’s finally happening. Things are definitely looking up.

Another positive thing… I’ve been reading! Trying to expand my knowledge on today’s web technologies. It’s insane how much information is out there. I feel so intrigued to learn more and more. Hopefully my brain can soak it all up and pass it on to others.

Oh yah! Shout out to Catrina Rose Molina! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I don’t know where you are And I don’t have your phone number because my last phone died. But I’d like to say I hope you have a nice day and I’ll be thinking of you.

Final Note — People never regret the things they did in life… they only regret the things they didn’t do.